Life Lessons Archive

Humorous insights about life, and how to find the quirky side to everything.

Long Time No Laugh

“SOMETIMES WAKING UP MEANS THE BEST PART OF YOUR DAY IS ALREADY OVER…” Hello everybody…or everybody left…or nobody at all… I’m sorry it has been so long since I’ve put new, fresh stories, material, and jokes up on the site. It’s been a crazy time here, and much of my time has been eaten up


Halloween used to be my favorite holiday.  Fun costumes, parties, and so much candy that even Walter Brimley “diabeetus” commercials can’t stem the flow.  There is no other time of year that you can go up to strangers doors and threaten them in a mask, and they’ll give you candy. Trust me. Notice that I


Hi folks (read: mom), Sorry it’s been a little while since I posted a Life Lesson.  I started a new job, things have been pretty hectic, and then I was on vacation (for the first time that I can remember in a long time!).  Don’t worry, I’m no more or less funny than I was

Leggings Are Not Pants

I have never claimed to be a fashion expert.  Heck, I’m the type of guy who buys a pair of jeans once every 2 years, and that’s just because they barely count as clothing after they’ve been through that much wear and tear.  I’ve never watched a fashion show, I don’t get clothing catalogs, and


For about as long as I can remember, people have always commented about my height.  Even as a kid, I was tall for my age, usually head and shoulders above my peers, and sometimes could look my elementary teachers in the eyes, which I think freaked them out a little (something about a second grader


“DRINKING COFFEE IS A FUN WAY TO BECOME DEPENDENT ON PAYING MONEY TO WAKE UP…” Something happens every day to me that I still find to be one of the most unusual and amazing things I have ever experienced.  Whether I go to the office, I’m at the doctor, at breakfast…it doesn’t matter.  Someone eventually


“THE ONLY REASON WOMEN’S MINDS ARE SO MUCH CLEANER THAN MEN’S IS BECAUSE THEY CHANGE THEM SO OFTEN” Yesterday I had the opportunity to spend some time with one of my closest friends (for almost 25 years…man I’m old!) and his wife-to-be, as we needed to grab suits for another friend’s upcoming wedding.  As we

Dead Words

“WHOEVER CAME UP WITH ‘STICKS AND STONES MAY BREAK MY BONES, BUT WORDS CAN NEVER HURT ME’ PROBABLY WAS NEVER HIT WITH A DICTIONARY” Sometimes I like to imagine the Grammar Police are real and they’re chasing you with handcuffs and a fully-charged taser.  Everywhere we look today, people are correcting each other’s grammar. It’s


“RICK ASTLEY IS A NICE ENOUGH GUY. HE’LL LET YOU BORROW ANY MOVIE IN HIS PIXAR COLLECTION, EXCEPT FOR ONE. HE’S NEVER GUNNA GIVE YOU UP.” Today I’d like to take the time to talk about something very near and dear to me…something that actually helps to define a part of who I am…something that


“IT’S PROBABLY BEST NOT TO MARRY ANYONE WHO REFERS TO THE REHEARSAL DINNER AS THE ‘LAST SUPPER'” Tomorrow is my 5 year anniversary.  5 years of marriage. That’s 1825 days. Weird way to start out a post about a time of celebration, right?  I am flabbergasted that it’s already been 5 years! Not only because